The underlying truth about being pregnant with baby number 2!
I started writing this blog around 4 months ago, it shares the start of my journey for baby number two! It’s been pretty plain sailing so far, well until recent events. Who knows what the world will be like in 5 months time! Anyway I have enjoyed documenting everything so far and reflecting on the different feelings from my first pregnancy until now. I am sure many of you can relate.
I started writing this blog around 4 months ago, it shares the start of my journey for baby number two! It’s been pretty plain sailing so far, well until recent events. Who knows what the world will be like in 5 months time! Anyway I have enjoyed documenting everything so far and reflecting on the different feelings from my first pregnancy until now. I am sure many of you can relate.
It’s weird when you find out you are pregnant with your second child. I mean don’t get me wrong, there is still a huge level of excitement but it’s much more subdued, less fireworks, more solo party popper.
With your first, at least in my case where we had been trying for 3 years to get pregnant, there was an instant elevation; a feeling of completeness, happiness and instant over protectiveness for the small bundle of joy growing in my belly.
But this time I already had a feeling of completeness, me, James and Louis. Having experienced pregnancy before, I didn’t have the ‘newness factor’, you know that feeling where suddenly you analyse absolutely everything you are doing. I mean being honest, since the word go I have dined out on the fact that I have to look after myself. But for me I ignore the exercise and healthy eating and just focus on “yes James I need to rest”, “no James you do the bins”, any form of lifting and anything with slight exertion…. He he I am terrible.
I found out in November.
I was late on my period.
This has happened before and normally after a few days of thinking, “could I be?”, my hopes fall flat and the red river flows in.
But on this occasion, two days turned to three. Three days turned to four. I got a pregnancy test and thought I would take it just to find out that I was not in fact pregnant and then presumable, I would then start my period albeit a bit late.
So James was working on his laptop downstairs whilst Louis played near by.
I went up to my bathroom, got out the pregnancy kit, peed on that little white stick, placed it on the side and waited 3 minutes.
3 minutes later I looked at the stick, read instructions and worked out what the lines meant, and clarified that YES I am in deed very pregnant!
Happiness. Disbelief. A whole mix of feelings came rushing in.
I went downstairs and placed the stick in front of James’ computer (I had washed it just so you know!).
He peered down, then looked up, the disbelief also transparent on his face. It sinks in. He jumps up. “really?”, “that’s amazing!”. We hug it out and take in the reality that our world is about to take on a whole new level of fucking craziness! (written before the coronavirus outbreak… oh how un-crazy it seems now !).
James felt disappointed that I didn’t reveal my pregnancy in a more fun way. My response “what do you want me to do, get a fucking marching band outside the dining room window?”. This is us to a T; understated, simple.
So that was it for a few days until I could go and see my GP. Even that was completely underwhelming. Whereas the first time every single minuscule step in my pregnancy journey felt exciting and interesting, this was a quick pop in, a pat on the back and as I walked out, the GP called me back in to offer me a flu jab. So a quick needle in the arm and off I go. You don’t even get a pack anymore, everything is done online and it’s down to the individual to write off to inform the NHS that you are in fact pregnant! Reception did give me a little ‘Emma’s diary’ magazine, (never read it first time around) and that incredible form… yes, the one you send off that gives you free dental for 2 years! Woo hoo
We gradually started telling friends and family, just as we saw people. Everyone was happy but being truthful, I often forgot to say anything as it all just feels a bit unreal this time around.
Just before Christmas on the 23rd December I had my first appointment with the antenatal department. The plan was that James and I would drop Louis to my mum’s, nip into the hospital for a quick 15-minute check-up then brave ASDA for our Christmas shopping. But oh no, I had forgotten that it was in fact a full 1–1.5 hours of interrogation (joking, slightly!), fact finding, urine samples and blood tests. We got to ASDA at 10am… yes it was a fucking nightmare!
In the appointment they first call you in by yourself to ask you personal questions about your relationship with your partner. Giving people a chance to express any concerns they may have. Then it was what felt like an endless questionnaire of medical history and questions about my last pregnancy. Luckily James was with me at this point as when asked “how many weeks pregnant were you when you gave birth”, I was blank — no bloody clue? Turns out 39 weeks! I guessed 36. Then, “how much did your first child weigh”, shit, this is bad, every mum should know this! James gave a guess, and was only a 1lb out. The lady has to look it up in my notes. Awful parents!
Having not needed a wee when I was first handed the pot, suddenly I rushed to the toilet to fill up my urine sample. It’s horrible having to hand it over, all warm — yuck! But she plonked it down without a care in the world.
Then it was time for my blood tests, but same as usual, my veins were “too thin” and I had to go down to Phlebotomy. There was a huge array of people all with their tickets. Sod this I have a supermarket to navigate, up to the desk I went and was kindly rushed through as I had already been at the hospital for an hour and a half!
James waited outside, during my first pregnancy James almost fainted at my first blood test! Yep, there he was head in hands being made a fuss of.
A few needles later, we were finished and out we went. This time tooled up with a few freebie packs, more things to get shoved in the back of my cupboard.
Unfortunately a week later I received a call to tell me that I had a urine infection so I spent 3 days trying to get a prescription from my doctors. What a palaver. The hospital never sent it to my GP. So my GP organised for me to get a prescription but it didn’t get to my local chemist. So whilst my family went out for a sightseeing day in London, I sat in drinking pure cranberry juice and watching shit chick flicks on Netflix trying to make myself feel better. Actually one of the films had a star cast from One Tree Hill, it wasn’t actually that horrendous. Check it out
So over Christmas I, of course, over-indulged but didn’t touch a drop of alcohol, something that doesn’t bother me as I am not a big drinker, what bothered me was pate!!!! No fucking pate!!!
During the first 12 weeks I have found myself having bouts of tiredness and a few days here and there where I have felt queasy. I had absolutely no sickness during my first pregnancy so this was a new feeling. Of course I googled it. Apparently sickness = baby girl. But it’s all a load of made up shit anyway isn’t it. I’ll just wait until my 20 week scan to hopefully find out the sex! My family are already having bets and my Mum is desperate for a girl, not because she is actual bothered, but because she wants an excuse to make cute baby dresses.
I am also being teased about having twins and the other day, to make it worse, my mum did some online prediction, you know those very truthful horoscope predictions based on nothing but your birth month. Well anyway for me it said to expect Twins in August. Weirdly I am due end of July so there was a small level of panic when she shared this news. If it is twins, hey ho. You just get on with it don’t you and just throw the idea of having any sort of social life out the window, right?
But in all honesty we don’t care what sex we have. Just healthy and happy. Oh, and one that doesn’t constantly cry. Oh, and one that likes to sleep a lot.
Baby Scan No 1–12 Weeks — 15th January 2020
We decided to tell Louis about his new baby brother or sister. Now being only 3 years old, we knew it would probably be quite difficult for him to comprehend, but he is a smart lad and we felt like we wanted to include him on the journey as much as possible. To be fair to him, he seems to get it. Although he stills tries to wrestle me daily even with my clearly growing bump. We have showed him pictures of what baby looks like in my tummy and we decided to take him along to the first scan.
So off we went to the Harris Birthright Center in Denmark Hill on 15th January 2020.
There was not much waiting around and shortly after we arrived I was having my bloods taken. Louis seemed to love the long hospital corridors so we made the ultimate parent sin and gave him our phone to watch Peppa Pig to keep him sat still. As this was a novelty, he didn’t want to put the phone down. So whilst in the scan room, Mummy and Daddy were cooing over the baby being shown on the screen and Louis was oblivious and more interested in what Peppa and George were getting up to!
Still he was a part of it and that’s what mattered.
It was so lovely seeing our little baby moving around. I felt so relaxed and it took me back to when I had my first scan with Louis. I was so nervous. Often the nurse uses the ultrasound for the majority of the scan measurements and pictures but at the end the main doctor takes over. First time around I assumed something was wrong, and panicked, But no, it’s just routine!
I waited for my blood results and felt nervous again. The first time was because it was all new and this scan detected any health issues with your baby, but this time I was nervous because, at age 37, I am classed as a geriatric mother and high risk. 20 minutes later, with the results given to me on paper, I was pleased to find out that all tests came back great and I had been moved into a low risk category.
Baby Scan No 2–20 Weeks — 20th March 2020
Now as I finish this blog, we have just had our 20-week scan and yes we’re amidst a very turbulent and uncertain time in the economy with the threat of Coronavirus. Louis and myself have been in isolation for 5 days and James has been cooped up for 2 having listened to the government advice that pregnant women are in a ‘high risk’ category.
You have to stay positive, that’s all we can do. It’s a strange situation thought isn’t it. Living within your own four walls with no contact from friends or family. Only popping out for medical visits or for food supplies. I sit here pondering what a different world baby number 2 is going to be born into but looking at the positives, it will certainly make me more grateful for everything I have and the time we get to spend with our loved ones.
James, Louis and I arrived at the hospital. The original plan was to leave Louis at my Mum and Dad’s but that wasn’t an option for us at the moment so, yet again aided with Peppa Pig on YouTube, we headed to the hospital. This time we drove, the train was fun with Louis last time but Covid-19 put a stop to that!
We walked into the reception and were met by two rather awkward looking receptionists who informed us whilst physically wincing that kids are not allowed in. What? Surely they could have given us a heads up! I mean what if a Mum arrives alone with her child? Does she get sent away? Not wanting to be over dramatic given that these are unusual times, James retreated back to the car with Louis. We understood that they have to do whatever they can to be careful but it was a bit of an emotional blow. Luckily I had prepared a packed lunch and snacks for Louis to keep him occupied as they weren’t allowed in the café either. I felt a bit teary. Daddy won’t be there for the big reveal but James called from the car minutes later telling me to ask the doctor if I could call him when they revealed it instead.
And they did! After an hour of scan pictures and measurements, the doctor informed he instantly knew the sex. I was pretty convinced it was a girl having been drawn to pink all pregnancy and also because when the baby was moving around I couldn’t see any, you know ‘male parts’. I called James and Louis whilst the doctor searched for an image that would ‘let me know’. At this point I knew I had been wrong. On the screen came a tiny pair of testicles. Were having another boy!!!!!!!
44I absolutely love knowing the sex as it makes it all so much more real. Louis is already bonding now with his little brother and we have selected the name ‘George’, yes ok its all very Wills and Kate but who cares, we had Louis first! Louis has started calling my belly ‘Georgie’ and yesterday out of nowhere he just said “Mummy I love you…and the baby”. I think he is going to make one beautiful, protective and affectionate brother.
I have been looking into some facts about raising boys and will definitely be looking into this in another blog. My family and close friends seem to be inundated with boys — out of 10 children of my close friends there are 8 boys and 2 girls. My mum’s last 5 grandchildren, including George have all been boys too. She was desperate to knit pink… maybe next time. Ha ha, as if, I’m stopping at number 2!
