Dealing With Our (ANGRY) Little Angels
This is going to be a short blog, shouting out to all the parents out there currently struggling during lockdown.
Yes struggling. Pulling your hair out. Breaking down. Crying. Not knowing how you are going to get through the week, the day, the hour!
So let’s lay our cards on the table here. Yes, I’m sure for some of you lockdown has been joyful. Maybe you’ve managed to spend more time as a family and it’s just so dreamy and beautiful. Well fucking done, I sound sarcastic but I mean it. That’s great for you.
But I’m talking to the people on the flip side of the coin.
The ones that look at other people’s social media about “how great life is during covid” and want to throw their phone at the wall and smash it.
Kids. Our little bundles of joy. Or should we now say our little bundles of frustrated energy.
I have had sooooooo many conversations with friends and family that have young children let’s say ages between 1–10 and the overall consensus is that they are becoming more and more angry and aggressive as the days go on.
From my own experience, Louis who is just 3 has turned into a moody angsty little boy. He screams if something doesn’t go his way and, when I say scream, I mean full on Hulk position, veins popping out his neck, face turning red screaming. He needs to control everything so if he doesn’t get his own way like “no Louis you need to brush your teeth before you have your morning snack” (usually a biscuit anywhere between 9–10am — he seems to constantly want snacks at the moment!) we have major meltdowns. And I mean MAJOR!
So every day is a battle to get him to brush his teeth. Sometimes it’s not until mid-morning when he realises a snack is more important then backing down.
I have a battle to get him dressed. If me or his Dad don’t turn it into a fun “race” game he is not interested. What do I do? Now I let him stay in his fucking pyjamas if that’s what he wants. I am honestly losing the will to fight.
Yesterday he started hitting. It started as a bit of a cheeky behaviour joke but then he just got more and more angry and kept smacking my arms. He has never hit before and needless to say he was strongly told off for it. But that escalated the situation even more as, currently, if you tell him off for ANYTHING he just falls apart emotionally. He sobs. Hyperventilates, you know those tears that stick around for a good hour after with the noise of him catching his breath every few seconds.
It’s a pressure cooker.
And now he has entered a new phase of “cant be bothered”.
Do you want to video call Nanny and Grandad? No
Do you want to play in your lovely garden with all your amazing toys? No
Do you want to colour in? No
Play playdoh? No
He wants an “indoor day” he says. Just wants to “chill” he says. So it’s mainly playing trains or watching his favourite tv shows.
Do I feel like a shit parent? Yeah sometimes I do, but do you know what, it’s strange, unprecedented times and I’ve come to realise that a lot goes on in our little ones head. So I pick my battles. If he wants to stay in his pair of thermal Thomas the Tank PJ bottoms in smouldering heat then so be it.
I draw lines at things like being in the sun. Of course, no sun cream means no fun outside. But as he seems to not give a shit at the moment about going outside, that’s not an issue I have.
But I have all this going on and only one child who is 3. I say that to show that I’m struggling and I don’t have the stress of trying to educate him at the same time. Yeah his nursery have been sending through some activities sheets, and yeah we have sat down a couple of times to draw shapes etc, but overall he just plays and connects with real life activities like cooking etc.
But some parents have several children. Plus they are trying to homeschool. Oh, plus still running the house — cooking and cleaning. Oh and maybe also trying to continue their jobs from home!
Fucking hell!!!!
So to those people who feel like you are failing don’t. It’s a bloody difficult time and you can only do your best.
And you may disagree, but just trying to be there for one another, being kind, having space to think and breathe and basically just trying to keep your child happy is more important then ticking a box to show you have followed an education syllabus correctly! A few shout outs:
A shoutout to my sister. Locked down with her 3 kids. Single parent. Trying to home school a 9 and 13 year old. Her 9 year old who has become more and more frustrated, refuses to do school work and actively rips up any paperwork in her face.
My brother and sister in OZ with two kids, one who is learning to walk the other who just doesn’t want to home school. They have focused on baking, crafts and even created a whole “chill out’ den for them all to enjoy.
My friend Danielle who is working from home, whilst raising three young kids with her hubby. Trying to give them the attention they are craving during lockdown.
Kelly and Gary trying to still run two businesses whilst looking after two children and juggling work hours, staff, house moves oh and potty training!
Rob and Nae who make the most out of every situation and are just dealing with each day with positivity.
Chris and Sam in America who have 3 kids under 5, working and trying to keep them all sane.
Helen & Carl trying to work from home whilst educating two small children who are being sent endless paper work and apps for them to continue their learning.
My cousin Jody who continues to work for the NHS whilst sacrificing the somewhat scary decision of putting her daughter into nursery through the covid-19 outbreak.
Let’s all give ourselves a fucking pat on the back.
Fuck other people’s Instagram.
Fuck the judgemental comments.
Fuck trying to be super mum or dad.
Just do what you can to stay sane. And keep your family as happy as possible.
Rant over.
